Friday, July 13, 2007

State by State

There's really amazingly little to be said about the last four days. You would think that an epic cross country drive would make for a better story, but really it was just me driving 8-10 hours a day. I would love to say that it gave me some deeper perspective or allowed me to reach some deeper realization but honestly everything I was going to learn from Project Exodus I had already learned before I went back to Houston. The drive consisted mostly of me listening to my ipod and me lost in thought. Even the long hours spent in my head produced almost nothing. It was just more of my mind's ever swinging pendulum as I alternated between thinking about needlessly complex philosophical issues and thinking about sex.

Other then that things changed primarily by state.

Texas was okay, but nothing new to me. It was mostly pick up trucks going as fast as they possibly can and me going as fast as I'm allowed to go and praying I don't get knocked off the road by one of the trucks in their endless attempt to try and prove that their hauling and towing vehicle is just as nimble as my sports car. I don't know what it is but something about Texan drivers is just naturally competitive, even when one person has a far superior machine for the situation.

Oklahoma was okay. That's it really, not a lot to say about the place.

Nothing of note has ever happened in Kansas and my presence there did not change that. The only thing that could be counted as noteworthy were the strange non-sequiter "Jesus trusts in you" and "Abortion kills" signs placed every 10 miles or so. I was happy to be out of rural Kansas.

Colorado was cool, I finally began to get some noteworthy scenery, and I got to check in with my Aunt and cousin. They seems to be doing fine, and 'Torie is astoundingly competent in the field of treachery for one so young. Mostly though it was nice to have a familiar face around, to provide some form of emotional relief.

Wyoming was a lot of fun. Excellent scenery, fun sloping and winding roads, overall a great state to drive through. I'm not sure anyone should live there, but a great state to drive through. I wish I'd gotten a picture of it, but on one of their giant hills I managed to get my display to read "700 miles to empty." I also had an interesting encounter with a "road damaged ahead" sign, and a brief roller coaster experience that was fun, even if it was probably bad on my shocks. Wyoming was also the place where they had periodic railroad crossing style gates along the road, and signs that read "when flashing return to town X." I didn't ask anyone, but I figure these were related to the "Strong wind next 5 miles" signs that someone had planted every 5 miles. It seemed like a waste to me, they should've just altered the first sign to read "Welcome to Wyoming! (Expect Strong Winds)" or perhaps "Welcome to Wyoming, The Windy State!"

Fuck Utah. My time spent there consisted of blistering heat, bad wifi, and horrible traffic. I'm done with that state.

Idaho was cool. I mean, I don't have any problems with it. Parts of it were on fire, which was awkward, and I was a bit smoky by the time I got out, but overall it was good.

Did you guys know that they pump your gas for you in Oregon? I had no idea, but apparently it's a state rule. They really should've put that on the sign.

Washington was a fun one to drive through. The vast hippie movement has ensured lush verdant forests to entertain the eyes of those of us who speed through them at 80 miles an hour. Very scenic. Another place with long down slopes as well. It's fun to be driving with your foot entirely off the gas and watch the needle climbing up from 85. Somewhere around 90 I decided that idling was going a bit too fast. WA actually had all of the good features of Wyoming, and better scenery. It would've been the best part of the drive had I remembered to charge my iPod the night before.


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