Thursday, April 20, 2006

Expletive Deleted

It's really a shame that I can't write these from anywhere. If I had been writing this immediately after leaving the math test you would have heard an epic oratory of pure anger and outrage. The full effect wouldn't have come across in text, but I think you would have gotten the point. When I do poorly and it's my fault I'm filled with disappointment. That happens more often then it should, and that fact makes me slightly more disappointed. But I put serious effort into this one. I legitimately tried, and still no. There isn't a key reason I failed either. I ran out of time, I didn't understand part of a question, I didn't spend enough time studying Riemann sums. That's not the real word, but I was told by two T.A.s that they weren't important and that I would essentially never need them once I knew integrals. I was angry because I tried, and I failed.

But anger is a poison. I released it, and now I'm just tired. It's more then that, I've been releasing a lot of anger recently and the after effect builds up. I'm world weary. I'm 19, I'm not supposed to be world weary. I'm supposed to be drunk and irresponsible. Well, I've got half of that down. I'm going to go now. I'm going to lie down for a while, rest, and reflect on my position. And then I'm going to look for my phone. Seriously, where the hell is my phone?

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