Another pointless rant about video games
Conrad's taking a globalization class, and is generally knowledgeable about globalization. Actually I have an entire rant on Conrad, I'll post that next, but I was talking about...
Max, I need you to Focus
Right! Globalization. Anyway the Chinese are coming. The Sleeping Dragon awakes.... Because of this I've been making a habit of playing as the Chinese in Battlefield 2. For those of you who don't know BF2 is based on a hypothetical situation where all current global tension breaks down in massive military assault. America beings widespread invasion of China and the middle east. In the expansion you can fight on American soil as well, but not yet.
Actually, BF2 had one of the best ads I'd ever seen. It was this collage of dramatic screenshots with one image centered in the middle. It was a textbook newscaster scene with the caption "Today the world peace process hit a major roadblock..." If I can find it I'll post it.
Now playing an FPS elicits much more dramatic player side reactions. I, as well as every other gamer, will spontaneously shout things while playing, and I'm slowly learning Chinese. You can tell I'm playing because you'll hear one of two things. Either my supervillain laugh (My laugh of triumph is amazingly supervillainish) when I manage to pull off an effective use of C4. Or me shouting "Que! Que! Que!" which is Chinese for "Go! Go! Go!"
Also, for no reason. I'm going to describe my style of play. I use the "Special Forces" kit. This includes a machine gun (An M4 carbine on the American side, and some Chinese machine gun I don't know about on my usual side) a silenced pistol, Hand grenades, a knife, and most importantly 5 charges of C4 plastic explosive. My love of, and expertise with, explosives carries over into the virtual world. My skill can only be described with a word from my peoples sacred language of 1337 sp34k. The word PWNZ. People don't realize that the crazy guy in the buggy who's driving nowhere near the field of battle is still a threat, because he's taking an ultra fast vehicle the long way, and arriving at the American artillery and radar stations just in time to cut them off with a few well placed explosives. They don't realize that when I was retreating I dropped a satchel of plastique, so when your tank rolls over it while I hug the ground behind a pile of sand bags and you suddenly get blown the fuck up I'm the one who wins. Not only that, but if I did it right you're now also down one key bridge. Reinforce that bitches. I've also gotten good at 2 tricks involving the jeeps. Trick one consists of speeding around a tank, dodging the opening shot, then jumping out next to it, planting two charges on it, and running like hell. If I can get out of range of the explosives I can take out a tank unharmed. If I cant then when one of my brother's in arms throws a grenade at the tank it'll set off my C4, and my ghost will laugh at the smoking American ruin. The second trick requires me to use up all 5 of my charges, but it can wreck anything. Get a jeep, or a buggy. Something fast and manuverable. Strap 5 charges to the front, get the detonator as your weapon, and start driving. If you're going full speed when you jump out the car keeps going. If you position it right it keeps going all the way out of explosive range. Get up to ramming speed, target whatever it is you need to go away (this thing has an amazing radius of effect) then jump out. The car rolls forward, you drop to the ground, and then push the little red button. This can take out a tank, a bunker, a mobile AA station, or an entire defensive platoon. After that you're cashed as far as explosives go, but man that one shot is amazing.
Max, I need you to Focus
Right! Globalization. Anyway the Chinese are coming. The Sleeping Dragon awakes.... Because of this I've been making a habit of playing as the Chinese in Battlefield 2. For those of you who don't know BF2 is based on a hypothetical situation where all current global tension breaks down in massive military assault. America beings widespread invasion of China and the middle east. In the expansion you can fight on American soil as well, but not yet.
Actually, BF2 had one of the best ads I'd ever seen. It was this collage of dramatic screenshots with one image centered in the middle. It was a textbook newscaster scene with the caption "Today the world peace process hit a major roadblock..." If I can find it I'll post it.
Now playing an FPS elicits much more dramatic player side reactions. I, as well as every other gamer, will spontaneously shout things while playing, and I'm slowly learning Chinese. You can tell I'm playing because you'll hear one of two things. Either my supervillain laugh (My laugh of triumph is amazingly supervillainish) when I manage to pull off an effective use of C4. Or me shouting "Que! Que! Que!" which is Chinese for "Go! Go! Go!"
Also, for no reason. I'm going to describe my style of play. I use the "Special Forces" kit. This includes a machine gun (An M4 carbine on the American side, and some Chinese machine gun I don't know about on my usual side) a silenced pistol, Hand grenades, a knife, and most importantly 5 charges of C4 plastic explosive. My love of, and expertise with, explosives carries over into the virtual world. My skill can only be described with a word from my peoples sacred language of 1337 sp34k. The word PWNZ. People don't realize that the crazy guy in the buggy who's driving nowhere near the field of battle is still a threat, because he's taking an ultra fast vehicle the long way, and arriving at the American artillery and radar stations just in time to cut them off with a few well placed explosives. They don't realize that when I was retreating I dropped a satchel of plastique, so when your tank rolls over it while I hug the ground behind a pile of sand bags and you suddenly get blown the fuck up I'm the one who wins. Not only that, but if I did it right you're now also down one key bridge. Reinforce that bitches. I've also gotten good at 2 tricks involving the jeeps. Trick one consists of speeding around a tank, dodging the opening shot, then jumping out next to it, planting two charges on it, and running like hell. If I can get out of range of the explosives I can take out a tank unharmed. If I cant then when one of my brother's in arms throws a grenade at the tank it'll set off my C4, and my ghost will laugh at the smoking American ruin. The second trick requires me to use up all 5 of my charges, but it can wreck anything. Get a jeep, or a buggy. Something fast and manuverable. Strap 5 charges to the front, get the detonator as your weapon, and start driving. If you're going full speed when you jump out the car keeps going. If you position it right it keeps going all the way out of explosive range. Get up to ramming speed, target whatever it is you need to go away (this thing has an amazing radius of effect) then jump out. The car rolls forward, you drop to the ground, and then push the little red button. This can take out a tank, a bunker, a mobile AA station, or an entire defensive platoon. After that you're cashed as far as explosives go, but man that one shot is amazing.
posted by Max at 12:09 AM
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