Deviant Creativity

The downstairs food service center has added a pasta bar. It works in an interesting way. You skip everyone waiting in line for Asian food, fill out a card with name sauce and various extras, pay, the person behind the register stamps the card, and later you get your pasta.

It seems like a pretty good system overall, but the potential for mischief is too high.

For one thing they charge you before they look at your card, it’s a flat rate. So if I request Alfredo, marinara, pesto, sausage, meatballs, chicken, and cheese is it the same rate as plain noodles?

Also the cards don’t have any real distinguishing logo on them. I could make one in word. More importantly I could make one with little tiny changes in word.

”Who ordered the pasta with chicken and… The blood of the innocent?”
”I’m sorry sir but we can’t give you pesto egg noodles and enlightenment for only 6:58”

The most obvious one by far though is the name blank. There’s all kinds of fun to be had with that. I’m not talking Bart Simpson crank call things either; you can do a lot better then that. Writing in the name of the cashier, the name of the chef, or the name of the cashier at 1101 which is 15 feet away are just some of the many examples. Creative use of pronouns. Writing in things like Forgetful, or absent, then not collecting. Also ridiculously over the top supervillan style names. Things like “The Evil Lord Slash-Stab” or “Doctor Raven Dark-Talon Blood.”

This is probably going to be one of those things that I never actually do, but it’s a great source of deviant creativity.