Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Very important Juices

A while ago I was talking to Kevin. He said he was going down to 1101 to get a drink, and I felt like getting one too so I followed. He mentioned that he had a lot of excess money on his UW card and only 3 days left at UW. He then asked 'Do you need anything?"

Let me tell you about Maximizing your wealth springs. It's the key fact that any source of recourses that you're not using to the maximum possible extent is going wasted. It's one of the only useful things a life coach will tell you, and the only thing I took away from "7 habits of highly effective dumbasses who think that they can fix all the problems with their life by reading a damn book."

Kevin was then given a first hand demonstration of a maximized wealth spring, as I piled a vast array of supplies, commodities, and generalized snacks onto my arms. I didn't stop until piling any higher would have meant completely obscuring my vision. When I approached the counter with my armful of goods the cashier girl said "We have baskets you know." My reply was that this was much more fun, and anyway this was a spending spree, and reason has no place in a spree.

I told you that story to explain that when I'm going in to buy something quick, regardless of how much I'm buying, I skip the basket phase and go directly to the perilous teetering pile phase.

So when I went in to safeway today to buy broccoli, asparagus, a pineapple, spicy Italian sausage, pesto sauce, and an entire chicken I piled them into my arms. When I loosed my horde of dead animals and green things* unto the belt I discovered I had a spot of liquid on my shirt. Something had leaked.

Now both the broccoli and the asparagus had water on them from the fine misting device they use to preserve them. But the chicken was also in a bag which had juice in it. So I had a very important question to answer. Was this water from a vegetable? Or was this going to give me Salmonella. These were very important juices.

*The outside of the pineapple is at least 51% green, so it counts.


Something I had lost sense of was made clear to me. I was told once by a baptist who was trying to convert me that all is made clear when I consult the scriptures. I didn't belive him, and if he was referring to the gospels I still don't belive him, but there is value in the sentiment of turning to the works of the great teachers. This time the buhdist scriptures.

"Enlightenment has not definite form or natuer by which it can manifest itself; so in Enlightenment itself, there is nothing to be enlightenend. Enlightenment exists solely because of deulsion and ignorance; if they dissapear, so will enlightenment. And the opposite is true also; there is no Enlightenment apart from delusion and ignorance; no delusion and ignorance apart from Enlightenment. Therefore, be on guard against thinking of Enlightenment as a "thing" to be grasped at, lest it too should become and obstruction. When the mind that was in darkness becomes enlightened, it passes away, and with its passing the thing which we call enlightenment passes also"

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Idle thoughts

TO Be Spellchecked, you were warned.

I've thought several times about writing an actual post about the start of the new term, but I can't form a coherent narrative. Now we all know that's never stopped me in the past, but this time I find I can't even form a good rant. I just have thoughts floating in a vast limbo of existance. Here they are.

My psych class is well timed, waking up at 9:30 feels much more natural.

Every time I go to a class that is the first in a series the first day is always essentially an advertisement for the major that class represents.

The crowd that mills around in the hall before psych lectures is interesting. The millers before a math or physics lecture is a buch of people who are either nervous and jumpy about social situations, or chatting nervously in small pockets about the upcoming test. They're squirrelly. The millers in front of psych are much more normal people. They chat without any real point in a way which is soothing, and which I think is another anti-enlightenment activity. In this crowd I'm surrounded by normal socially balanced people, meaning that I'm as far from my peers as could be.

How are you're classes going Kevein? Huh? HUH!? Bastard.

I still hate math.

At least this quarter the worksheet portion of math is done in class. but in order to cancel out any joy I may have we now have a quiz every tuesday. DAMN YOU KALKULOSE!!!

When I saw the word "Electromagnetics" at the head of the physics web site it was like christmas morning. I'm finally through the bullcrap 18th century stuff. Newtonian mechanics haven't been new since Newton you punks.

I always forget how how annoying having a regular exercise schedule is until I'm on one.

I played DDR on light mode, I got a B overall rating, I thought I was doing pretty good. Then a Tiny TINY Asian guy comes up and gets a perfect on Crazy. I really need practice

I've been to safeway twice this month and haven't bought anything.

Next quarter, we should get the lowest meal plan, and put the diffrence between that and the premium onto my husky card so I can spend it at safeway.

If I draw two anime faces on my arm the person next to me in psych will draw word bubbles and the words "Dude!" and "Sup!!!"

Psych people look at you weird. Both the professor and the T.A.s They look at you in a way that is both a "I'm interested in you because I'm a friendly social person." way, and a "I'm intereseted in you specimen #0025721" way. It's not even something behind the eye, both are clearly present and obvious.

Monday, March 27, 2006

1st Rule of War

City of Villans

I’ve got class in… 5 hours, but I’m up now in a way which is clearly nervousness based, so I figure I may let you guys in on my new game.

You may recall that I had started playing DDO, which I described as a highly innovated and new kind of game, and it is. However innovative and new aren’t always good, so I took the $40 of my expense account that I had queued up for the next 3 months subscription that game and instead bought City of Villains.

City of Villains is kind of the sequel and kind of the expansion pack to City of Heroes, a game which I’ve played a great deal in the past. CoH is most remarkable for the pure drama of its game play. It’s a word where everyone fights in comic book levels of cinematic flair, and the fight where a player charged into 12 enemies is routine and one that the player will win.

City of heroes is also well known for being a game with an amazing costume system, and CoV is no different. I’ve had a lot of fun with the newly added villain costume options. However I was never a costume creation addict as much as I was a character concept addict.

My first was a classic artistic rebellion. While CoV is filled with people who are obviously supernatural, mutants, monsters, and the anti-super heroes dressed in their skull adorned dark spandex, my first character had a very mundane back-story. He’s of the mastermind archetype, meaning that his key power is summoning minions, and his combat style obeys one very simple theory. Nobody gets by 7 people with machine guns. He doesn’t have any glowing powers, the only clearly supernatural thing he can do is super jump, which is loads of fun, but He moves in and the sound effects created by me and my currently only 3, minions just Hosing the enemy with lead is great. He’s not super, He’s just a tricky a bastard. He’s Slyz.

My next was an attempt at the brute archetype. I love their concept. They’re the tanks of the game, but their damage dealing is also listed as high, because every time a brute takes damage, or deals damage, they get a small amount of fury. The more fury a brute has the more damage is dealt by their attacks. I added into this my interesting costume idea based around being a killer robot. The Idea of a robot berserker amused me. The Bio for this character, something most people leave blank shamefully says, “The Ultimate robot warrior. Slyz Mk II was constructed for unknown purposes by a scientist gone completely insane. Possessing only a minimal A.I. Slyz Mk II feels not emotions. And it makes him SO ANGRY.”

Once again, I, Max Willson, am the Patron Saint of Irony.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Side Note

I just busted my hand raving at my desk. It'll get better. It's not a serious injury, I just thought it was an interesting note.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Pike's Journey

So I went back to Pikes. I wandered around some more, There's an indoor portion of it too as it turns out. Inside are numerous grand esoterica shops many of which fit my esoterica needs. They tended to have better supply then those on the Ave as well, but with a noteworthy lack of convince. The inner portion was non half-giant compatible in a way that didn't bug me. It's architecture is chaotic and almost organic, I didn't fit but it was okay because this building didn't grow around me, it grew around the regulars who all seemed to know when to duck and when to strafe through a narrow aisle.

I bought some of the organic produce, I'll let you know how that goes. I didn't buy any of the ultra-fresh seafood because I don't know essentially anything about cooking seafood, but I plan to look it up, get my tuxedo T-shirt and have a fine lobster dinner one of these days.

I accomplished my shopping goal which was to buy more pants. I lose one pair to wear and tear. I knew they had been wearing down, which is reasonable given that I've had them for well over a year, and possibly over 3, but the washing process dealt the final blow, and what had once been a thin spot turned into a hole. I'm considering patching them, but for the mean time I'm down a pair. I also lost a pair due to a pyrotechnics accident. I was outside on the basketball court balancing half a plastic Easter egg which I had filled most of the way with napthalene. It rocked more violently then expected, splashed me, and burned a patch of one of my pairs of jeans. I'm fine, and it didn't burn through, but while trying to scrub out the burn I scrubbed out the fabric, making a hole bigger then would be easily patchable. It's also worth note to the parents that I did this after telling a person who was reading on the steps nearby to help if I called for it, and that I was wearing goggles and gloves at the time. Thanks go to Kevin for the goggles.

It's an interesting eventuality that I returned to this store. The first time I went downtown I went with my F.I.G. group. We we're assigned to take pictures and note key sites etc. It's part of the classes general "Make the students adapt to the new living space" thing. When we first got off I took a picture of the Big and Tall shop, my figmates gave me weird looks, but I responded simply that "To me that's a very important store." I didn't question it then and I don't question it now, but I actually hadn't gone to that store until today. I have a history of wearing things until they break, so I don't have to buy clothes very often, but I'm glad that I got off there and created that memory, because I doubt any of the normal people clothes shops could fit me.

On a directly related note I'm probably going on a pseudo diet/weight loss program of my own highly unspecific design. I haven't felt particularly motivated to do this since my historical successful attempt at it. I've been... Well not skinny, but non-fat, and really it didn't seem much better. However, I've grown annoyed enough at the half-giant incompatibility that I'm going to take some measure to reduce the aspect of that which I have control of.

The plan is very simple. My diet doesn't have enough vegetables in it, and I should probably do more exercise. I'd tried the vegetables thing earlier but I find that I don't go to safeway enough to have greens around that I can rely upon not to be spoiled. It's general a 3 day or so period before it beings to pass it's prime. So now, every day, I'll walk the 10 blocks to safeway, buy vegetables for just that night, walk 10 blocks back, then cook and eat them. More exercise because I'm adding a mile or 2 to my daily allotment of walking, and more vegetables because that's why I'm walking there in the first place.

Back to today's wanderings. I took the bus back from the downtown/pikes place area up to 47th and began walking. I noticed university video is going out of business. It's kind of a shame, but I rarely went there anyway so it isn't that big of a deal to me, although I will miss the irony of having a place which advertises it's adult videos located directly beneath a Tai-Chi center.

I am the patron saint of Irony.

Going out of business means one clear thing to me. Cheap videos. My TV has a built in VCR, and VHS tapes go for next to nill these days, so I decided to root around. I got some pretty good finds. Neon Genesis Evangelion, I think I got the movie. It's called Genesis 0:6 The 4th child. I'll have consult Kevin on this one, as he's the one who introduced me to the series.

The thing that gets me is that Genesis 0:6 is the first stage of the creation of Heaven. It's "And God said, let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters." That's according to the Christian script anyway. I studied genesis in Hebrew, It's key to know that the word "Shemaim" means sky, while "Maim" means water. I think in the torah the verse is translated to show God Dividing heaven from sky, which makes a great deal of sense because the next verses refer to God dealing with the water that becomes heaven, and the water below heaven. It's also interesting that God, according to genesis, creates dry land from a fully watered world. I've heard it said that this is a bible code thing showing that humanity evolved from sea creatures, but I'm pretty sure I could work the bible code around to find the phrase "The Bible Code is all lies" if I tried hard enough. I'm essentially certain I could do it if I was allowed to use geomatria.

Wow, I got way on a tangent there. Anyway, I also got the original 1975 rollerball, which I've heard is good but have never seen, and one of the midnight madness series to answer my ongoing question of "Who is Elvira outside of the pinball machine in the hub game room."

I then went to safeway to find that they were still out of pesto. It's been 5 days now, when are those punks going to restock. I went to walgreens which doesn't sell Pesto, but I admit I suspected that before I even walked in the door.

I then went to trader Joes, which did have pesto. I also noticed a few very interesting things. All of the clerks are 20ish year old males, none of them are clean shaven, most of them have long hair. Hippies. Most of the people there who were clearly adults and not still in the grey area quagmire of "young adult" were buying wine. They were also buying groceries, but a lot of wine is being sold there. The key thing though is that my husky card may work there, I didn't ask this time because I'd been walking for the past 4 hours, was carrying my pikes stuff, my safeway stuff, and my videos, and generally felt like going home, but I plan to ask later.

And.... That's it. The new kid should arrive any day now, I half expect him to arrive today, but it's getting on the day for that to happen. I plan to do the last stage of my withdrawal from what will be his space after I finish typing this up. Conrad hasn't begun withdrawing, but has mentioned that he may live at home this quarter. He's more annoyed by the triple room thing then I am. It's a matter of how active of a roommate people are. Eric was barely there at all. He was extremely tidy, and only went back and forth between his bed and his computer. He kept to himself, and didn't say much. Most of my conversations with him consisted of him asking if he could have a pop tart and me saying sure. I think I may be similar. I'm not tidy by any means, but I keep to myself mostly. I'm not nearly as withdrawn as Eric was, and thankfully I'm not at his level of MMORPG addiction (it had him by the horn) but I think I'm also a less active presence then average. Assuming the new kid is average level of presence we'll be at an all time high, and that's what I think bugs Conrad the most. He needs his space, so to speak. I can sympathies with it, but I've also learned to just roll with things like this. I've benefited immensely from taking up the practice of "rolling with it."

Also, for the record, the blogger spellcheck Sucks. I'm spellchecking these things in word from now on.

Pike's Place Market (part 1)

I left at around 7:30 to go to pikes place market. I was clearly having no luck sleeping, so I decided to do something will all my wakefulness.

Pikes is actually only a few blocks from the area I call downtown. It's a perfect fringe zone. It's a place where the Normie-Deviant gap is bridged. As a deviant I felt right at home, but most of the people there who aren't working there are people I'd call normies. It's a place where normal people can go for something a little outlandish and a place where outlandish people can be amongst their own kind.

On a semi-related noted there was an ordinance recently in Seattle that vastly limited strip clubs. After going to pike's I'm convinced it was done primarily to chase the strip clubs out of Pikes. The makret is a well known place and Normie P.R. doesn't like the giant Showgirls Theatre in their scenic view.

There was one key problem though. I was there at around 8:30. The place opens at 10. I expect to have a great time there, Later Today. It's about 9:40 now, I'm gonna get a nap and head back around noon.

One thing I must report on though is the fish. The scents of the market are amazing because there are huge numbers of flour and fruit stands, and vast fish stands. The scent doesn't change gradually either, for reasons I cannont understand you pass through a wall and go instantly from bright yellow flowers to fresh Alaskan Halibut. And they mean fresh. I asked the guy about it and he said that the giant fish that was sitting on ice before me had been caught less then 12 hours ago. I plan to look up how to cook either lobster or crab and hit up one of the ludicrously fresh seafood places.

The Freshness also applies to farm products. All of the local hippie organic farmers come to Pikes to sell their genetically inferior, but fresh and delicious food. While I'm still a supporter of G.M. foods, I will say that in general I like organics better. I think that if I could get G.M. food farm fresh it would be equal, but I can't, and getting farm fresh organics is really easy in the north west.

Idle Thoughts: Sonics

My dad mentioned to me recently that the head of the UW bioengineering department had some significant part in the development of the sonicare toothbrush. It seemed odd to me because a rotating bristlehead seems like a clear industry side no research pure engineering making an object to fit this market need kind of item. He claimed that the device may actually do something involving sonics of some sort.

I was thinking about this while using my sonicare toothbrush this... Sunrise during period of insomnia (It's a shame too. I slept fine since the end of finals and then BAM, this gets me.) Anyway, I was thinking about using sonics to attack plaque.

So what is plaque? I don't know for sure and I didn't look it up because what I'm writing now is a transcription of thoughts I had while shaving and brushing my teeth, but my understanding is that it's micro-organisms that live in and around your teeth. They feed on the food residue and then later on the tooth itself. The secondary phase of the feeding makes them a pathogen, of sorts, and hence toothbrushing.

So how would you use sonics to attack microorganisms. One thought occurs to me. Constructive interference. If you knew a lot about those micro-organisms you could make a clear guess at the wave pattern of a given sound going through their body. You could then find the wave that would cause an amplification of itself inside the body, resulting in a sort of sonic tremor inside the cell, ripping the cell open.

That's a theory. I'm not sure it's valid. Unlike normal wave mediums cells have an extremely complex structure, so it may be impossible altogether, but lets assume for now that it is possible given enough data about a kind of cell to find the frequency which will destroy it.

So how much do we know about cancer cells? In theory it shouldn't damage the surrounding tissue to much, you may have problems calibrating it so that the wave arrives properly after going through the person, but I'm sure you could get around that with either extensive testing on a patient by patient basis, or tiny micro-emitters placed inside the patient.

A key fault in my thinking occurred to me though. Cells aren't all that different from each other. It may be that the frequency which would kill off a brain tumor would also kill off all of the neighboring non-tumor brain cells. It depends heavily on how much a cell changes when it becomes cancerous.

There's a lot I don't know here but it's an interesting idea. It's another one of the "force at a distance" things that fascinates me.

Thursday, March 23, 2006


My most recent wandering was an interesting one. I mixed things up by leaving at 11 p.m., rather then a.m., and despite the fact that I was setting out on my own in a big city after dark, which is a really dramatic phrase, suprisingly little happened. I didn't bring my notepad, which may have been a mistake, but here's what I remembered.

Lets see... I saw a car crash. It was very disappointing. Horn, crack!, then they both pull over and talk it over like mature responsible adults, which is much less entertaining then it could've been, but probably better in the end.

I should go to trader Joes, the place looks good. Actually I should go Roosevelt street more in general. It's only 3 blocks west and it offers a variety of entertainment on par with the infamous Ave.

I saw a really cool hobo. He was playing on a drum set made of buckets liquor bottles and milk crates. Clever design and he was really good. It was like the mobile beat wagon picture I posted wayyy back, only this guy was local and a better drummer.

Hmm, they're conducting a test of the fire alarm system. A voice just said so over the P.A. That's not related at all to what I did last night, but it was a weird occurrence. And now the alarm is going off and I'm supposed to ignore it. It's annoying, but not a big deal. Hey! How long has Lander had a P.A. system? Hmm...

Back to last night... What else... Oh right, I saw a pair of homeless kids one of whom was leading a bike that said "Smoke me out" they passed by and each individually asked me for weed. They seemed nice, but it's not hard to tell why they're hobos.

A weed themed hobo, the one without the bike from the above snippet, told me I can make $20 and hour beta testing games. I don't' really trust him (he's a reefer themed hobo after all) but I'm looking into it anyway.

I saw Spare Some Change in a covinence store buying a sobe energy drink. It turns out that when he's not begging he's in the nearby stores buying food/drink etc. He speaks with the safeway staff in a way that suggests he's friends, or at least work friends, with most of them.

In that same convince store (Must resist urge to call it a Korean store, the place is really something right out of a stereotype handbook) I found caffeinated chocolates for sale. They're delicious.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006


I realized about 3/4 of the way through that this post dosn't have a point. This blog is also a record for myself, and this one is purely for my own notes in the grand study of me. If you're looking for actual content go elsewhere.

I'm here today to talk to you about comics. I read a lot of them, mostly on the internet, and none of them mainstream. I don't have any illusions about being cool or artistically superior because the comics I read are indie, or underground, or what have you, I simply enjoy them more.

More imporantly I'm here to talk about my favorite artist. He's an utterly insane man known as Johanen Vasquez. I think I may actually own all of his printed work now, there isn't much of it so it's pretty easy, but I nonetheless own it all.

The key thing to know about Vasquez is that he's a 1% artist. 10% of people will be able to tolerate the abundance of utterly insane violence and see that it's all done as a means to be obviously over the top rediculous, and 10% of people will find him funny, so only 1% of people will actually enjoy it. I happen to be one of those 1%. I'd predict that most of the people who read this, those of whom are in my family anyway, would be repulsed by it.

The Best example of this is fillerbunny. It's a truely horrible work of comedic genius. I actually spent the last hour reading 15 pages of it because I was forced to spend large amounts of time just laughing.

Once again, you'd probably think it was horrible and that I'm a sick sick person for enjoying i.

I just forgot what my point was, but great guy, good stuff.

Idle Thoughts

It's simpler to avoid your problems rather then solve them.
And occams razor teaches us that the simplest solution is the right one.

Hence, logically, it's always right to avoid your problems.

Monday, March 20, 2006

The Wanderer

The following is the things I wrote while wandering. A line break means that time has passed. I wrote my thoughts periodically from time to time.

I got at 7th and pine; I was now officially in a state of first degree lost. That was my plan but I had made sure to bring enough money for cab fare all the same. I walked a block south to the Westlake center, it was a mall. No, not a mall, a “Shopping Center” It was a mall meant for people who spent a lot of money on appearances. Normal people, Normies. I left the place as soon as I saw the Hot Topic.

I wandered my way out of the place pausing to reflect on the fact that an escalator that goes down doesn’t escalate, and that I had taken stairs up two floors and reverse escalator down two floors. Outside was more in the same flavor. Old navy, starbucks, Nordstrom’s, Starbucks, Macys, The Gap, and another starbucks. It repulsed me; this must be how drow feel about sunlight.

Let me illustrate this. I took this picture

then I turned 180 degrees and took this picture

I did not move from the spot, only turned around.

I follow a parking garage into another shopping center. I must be a masochist. I see a sign that says turn back, but I do not heed it.

The Music inside is designed to placate and subvert. If you replaced the word customer with the word supplicant on all of the faux courtesy signs you’d get a clearer image of their intent. The presence of an EB games is a harsh reminder that spike TV has given my culture to the Normies.

I escalate to the heart of this great abomination of commerce. Everything is scented, brand named, and over priced. The great shame is that the center itself has a cool design. A tower, escalators on opposed sides spiraling up and down. It’s so grand in its design, but then they fill it with this…

I climb to the heights of the spire. I find the treasure I was promised. God Bless AMC and their many many screens. I need to be back here in two hours.

I wander the streets again. I’ve noticed and inclination to walk downhill so I intentionally walk uphill from here on. One block is a sea of temptation. Steakhouse, Cheesecake, Game works. I leave behind the accursed block. I see an interesting sign.
”Optical illusions”
Cool, a magic shop. It’s a damn optometrist. Bastards. I wander on…

Either my seat in the theatre is broken or it reclines more then I thought. The guy who checked my ticked also sold me my drink, he does everything around here. I can’t see the lines on my notebook anymore; they’ve turned down the house lights. I should probably (something illegible, I think it’s “Stop writing”) Lucky number sleven looks good. Morgan freeman could sell me anything.

V for Vendetta is a great movie

I’ve figured out how starbucks works in downtown Seattle. It’s all about availability. If you start at any point in downtown Seattle, turn in a random direction, and walk a block, you’ll be within one block of a starbucks. This is also true if you started at a starbucks. It’s also highly possible that it would remain true if you added up and down to possible directions.

I just missed my bus. I also must look like a nutjob. My wardrobe is a mockery of the New York all black sheik; I like to refer to it as “Black on Black Violence.” I’m constantly looking around and muttering to myself. I periodically pull out a camera and take several pictures of only one thing. And what’s probably worst of all I keep writing in a notebook I pull out of my vest with an appropriately over dark black pen. There’s probably a reason people like me are usually on out at night, but I enjoy the daytime now as well. The skyscrapers hide the sun and shift and amplify the wind. Mans greatest constructions have created a windy overcast world. They’ve ruined what they sought and delivered unto me a playground. Hey my Bus.

Did I really write “Hey My Bus?” I’ve gone totally mad.

Hey this bus goes all the way up to Safeway.

Those neutral people make some good cake rolls


What are these people doing? You pack up the whole of a highly valuable video game, you provide the thing illegally over what is proabably an equally illegal sharing network, and you don't include the damn CD KEY. Amatuers! Now I have to go steal all kinds of other things.

It's probably a bad sign that electronic theivery has moved out of the realms of being something I might consider wrong, to being something I'm neutral about, to be an obstruction between me and my delicious stolen goods. How I loves my stolen goods.

Shifting selves

I'm not sure if anyone except kevin will understand this, but I've realized the nature of my problem.

Too much Sulfaras, not enough Slyz. Sulfaras is a lost cause, You know my feelings on paladin-ing, and how it's all an illusion. It leads to him being mopey and beaten, but you can't beat Slyz.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Hello Moto

My phone has minutes again. It dosn't have almost any battery, but at least it's got minutes. I'll work on that other part.


I must admit I enjoy facebook wall posts more then I probably should. It gives me a creative outlet my generalized contempt. I just wrote the following one.

Dear Josh.
I only remembered it was your birthday becaues facebook reminded me.

-Max Willson

P.S. It's a joke you bastards.


I have the vague memory of last night, I woke up around 4 becasue someone had entered the room, I reached for my baseball bat but it wasn't there. It turns out I'm in my dorm room, so the bat behind my bed at home wasn't there. Niether was the knife under my dorm bed, it turns out that the meatloaf I made had also disarmed me. It shall pay. Anyway, there was someone by Conrad's computer, I'm pretty sure it was Conrad. He said something about getting his stuff and then going. I realized that there was no immidiate danger, so I went back to sleep. When I woke up this morning niether Conrad nor his computer were here.

So either Conrad went home for spring break, or he was robbed and kidnapped. Either way I get a single room for the time being.

Status Report

Satus report scheduling officer.

Well sir, the plan for today was to waste the entire day.
Mission Acomplished sir.

I spent some large part of today wandering inside of the dorms. I'm not sure why, but this is no time for reasonable motives. 4th floor was empty. 5th floor was empty. some guy on the 6th floor gave me a weird look. The 7th floor was a graveyard. Quiet as, quiet as a graveyard. I needed the blue skeleton key to get to the 8th floor, and I wasn't able to beat the Minotaur to get it, despite having mastered the art of chaining my already potent fire spells.

So yeah, uneventfull day, but I enjoyed it.

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Stupid, Stupid, Stupid.

It's now officially spring break, almost nobody is here. Only me, Sarah the R.A., and I think also Conrad. Let me stress the fact that two people who are bothered by the fact that they're in a double, and distraught (actually I'm the only one who's distraught, It's a difference in the nature of our personalities. I go from bothered to distraught Conrad goes from bothered to pissed, which he is) by the impending third person are in a room together. There are roughly 20 other rooms along the way that are empty, but us two are in a room together. What the hell? Shouldn't we be spreading out? Man, we are stupid people.

Oh right

I also need to get the rest of the Neon Genesis Evangelion series.

Blowing my mind.

I've just watched another episode of the Anime "Neon Genesis Evangelion" It's one that I've watched a few times but never enough to establish a stable continuity. I have no idea what's really going on in this episode, but it's tapped into so much of my mostly lost apochryphal knowledge. The signifigance of the 33rd day, teh nature of unification of being, the initial human creation split, it rings so many bells but they form no coherent song. I need to get back my books.

Waking Max

Kevin left today

I had the idea that I would get up early and say goodbye, do the basic good friend thing, but I slept through it. I’ve slept through so many important moments in my life. He was the last of the constants too. This next quarter isn’t looking to be so great, no more Kevin, new roommate. My mind wanders.

Zaftig are you AFK or something?

Or right, I was playing D&D online. Sigh, another hour of my life lost to killing kobolds. So many kobolds die, and more always come. I miss people. I miss Kevin, but I also miss Hannah and Ted and Shlomo and Andrew and Yoni and Stephen and Julius and Brendan. I need to go to Safeway. I miss a lot of them, and it’s half my fault. I haven’t done much in terms of keeping in touch. It seems that I may have lost nearly all of the constants in my life.

”Spare some change?”

He’s back? My life is always so well dramatically timed. It’s eerie. I need many things. I end up buying a huge number of cans and boxes because they’re available ten for ten dollars. I don’t need ten, I don’t even really have room for ten, but I surrender myself to savings. I think about meals I plan on making during the week. I should re-open the bistro for everyone who is here over spring break. I’d have to put fliers on ever floor, not enough people are here on this floor to make a good sale. I’m not sure I want to do that, my recluse is opposed to the idea of putting up that many fliers and of breaching the floor barrier. Weren’t we at war with the other floors earlier? It’s something we’d have to do to survive anyway.

Someone took all the pesto.

Who would buy out that much pesto? Is it clear to the back? It is. Damn. Who could possibly enjoy Pesto that much? Someone like me. I hate people like me, they’re cramping my style. I was doing the me thing way before they were. Speaking of things that I hate, I’m opposed to some pop jerk singing old Disney songs over the P.A. system at Safeway. Both because I’m not a big fan of old Disney songs, and as part of the Maxonian Movement against some pop jerk. There’s too many hot pocket boxes in the cart. They’re 6 for $10. Oh damn, did I pickup 10 instead of 6. No, ok. More vegetables. Potatoes, hmm. 2 for a dollar, that’s not too bad. Oh wait, two pounds for a dollar. Wow, potatoes are cheap. He he, remember that scene from lord of the rings? Anyway… Cantaloupe sounds good. Hmm… I don’t really know how to judge a cantaloupe. Well, this one doesn’t seem evil in any way, let’s get it.

Food groups, Sound off

Hot pockets!

Hot pockets are not a food group. Oh yeah smarty? What group do they go in then? Well they’re… Hmm… Hot pockets, check. Oh nice! 10 2 liter bottles of Safeway brand orange soda for 10 dollars. That’s a great deal. Oh damn. I can’t carry 20 liters of soda back with me. Much less the 40 liters it would take to make my unholy admixture and still get the necessary savings. Ok lets swing around and go out we just nee-Phone Cards! Come on T-mobile…. Alright. Apparently T-mobile is an authorized T-mobile dealership. And Radio Shack isn’t, that’s messed up. Gah, This stuff is really heavy. Don’t worry, its’ only ten blocks…


On Thu, 16 Mar 2006, hfsinfo wrote:

Dear Student,

A new resident has been assigned to your room for spring quarter. Please clear any areas of your room that the new resident may expect to occupy in order to create a welcoming environment. HFS staff will enter rooms during Spring Break to ensure that adequate space is available for the new occupant.

From: Maximilian Coale Willson
Sent: Thursday, March 16, 2006 10:48 PM
Subject: Re: New Roommate For Spring Quarter

I'm almost certain I upgraded to a super-triple earlier. while it's still quite possible to clear out the room I'd prefer not to. I'd also like to make sure I'm not paying for the super triple if I'm not getting it's more super aspects.

-Max Willson

Dear Max,

I spoke with the Terry Desk Supervisor, and she said that she does not have any record of you and your roommate requesting a super-triple. You are currently being charged the triple room rate, not the super-triple rate, so you are not paying for anything super that you aren't getting. Unfortunately we will not be able to re-assign your new roommate in order to allow you to super-size your room at this time. However, if you are really not looking forward to having another roommate, you are welcome to request a transfer to a double room. Room changes may be requested through the room change request form on the Resident Access website at .

That's the end of the e-mail exchange we had. I have no intent of switching out rooms because of the sheer hassle of the process combined with the potential of the result to be nill. This is a bad thing though. In order to fully understand this you need to know that while Conrad and I get along, we're both people who would be happier in a single. We're both people who need our own space, so to speak. Eric was okay primarily because he went back and forth from asleep to playing WoW at a level of addiction that put mine to shame, so he wasn't much of an obstruction. But in the days since his absence we've both grown used to the extra space. I lament the loss of my shelf (erics bed) and the loss of my pantry (eric's closet), but I have no idea how conrad is going to cope. He's taken over the entire extra desk.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Phone Dead

My most recent outing included an entirelly unsuccessfull attempt to get more minutes for my phone. It turns out T-Mobile hates convience, and so you have to go to an "Authorized T-Mobile Outlet" in order to buy more minutes. There's one downtown, I'll get it fixed before long, but don't expect my phone to be up right away.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Spare some change

There used to be a guy in front of safeway who would always say "Spare some change" as you walked by. I usually gave to him.

He's imporant because he was one of the only constants in my life. He was a little detail that I could always rely upon to be there. I've been there at 6 a.m. and seen him, so too have I been there at 2 a.m. and seen him. I mentioned him to my father when he was visiting on our way to safeway, and that was the first time I'd been there when he wasn't.

He hasn't been back since.

Part of me thinks I may have dispelled him by mentioning him as a constant, but that's got the clear counterargument that I've mentioned his consitincy to Kevin before and he wasn't banished then.

I'm not sure what my point is here. It could be a lesson on teh value of the little things, or maybe on the importance of a constant in your life, but most of all he was an intersting bit player in the grand theatre of my life, and now his role is unfilled. I lament the loss.

Dr. Willson Talks About Metals or Something

This was originally written last week.

I saw my father present today. It's kind of interesting. I've heard him speak about having to do these various presentations, but I hadn't actually seen one before. I only followed what he was saying until about half way through, at which point the science became far far over my head. One key thing struck me about it though.

My dad came to speak before my class once when I was in... 4th grade I think. I don't remember much of what he said, but I remember him talking about biochemistry of some sort, gene something I think, and showing a picture of coin with Janus on it after saying "You might get something like this" It was a good dramatic moment, and probably where I first learned about Janus. He had a very similar thing with a platypus in this most recent presentation, saying that while they're made glow in the dark tobacco, they will probably never achieve something as weird as this (flips to platypus). In both lectures he had that same basic joke, and then went into a more serious discussion of whatever it was he was discussing.

It's an interesting anecdote on its own, but it also makes me reflect on the nature of maturation. Or not so much maturation, but the nature of change of a person over time. At the time of the first lecture I was a plucky young student, filled with uncrushed hopes and admirations. Now I'm a bitter teenager, filled with contempt and internal conflicts. But Dad hasn't changed all that much. A lot has happened to him in the intervening times, but he's still the same basic person. Change decays exponentially.

I sort of already knew this because I recognize that to me 2 years ago is a huge amount of time, but to my grandfather it's not nearly as much. But you don't fully appreciate until you see something like this.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Idle Thoughts

Hmm.. Chicken Quesadillas, those do sound good.
But then we'd be buying food from the cafes, something we've agreed is overpriced even when it's not real money.
Wait a second; we learned how to make quesadillas in scouts.
Right, Miguel taught us
The Following Joke has been removed because it's mildly racist. It wasn't that funny anyway.
Ok, but where do we get cheese and tortillas.
What about chicken?
We have chicken left over upstairs.
Right and we can buy the cheese and tortillas from the store.
You guys do realize this is going to cost more overall then if we had just bought them
maybe, but we'll probably get more out of it.


Gah, they don't have the good Tabasco.
Max you're from the southwest, you'll never find Tabasco good enough for you up here.
That's not true.
Oh yeah, where'd you get the good Tabasco
I got it in an unlabeled bottle from a Mexican guy on the side of the road up near Richmond. Ohh... Yeah you may have a point.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006


I'm doing fine, I still haven't gotten around to adding my queued blog posts,

I'm not doing that now either though, I've got to send a... shoutout, I guess, to my collective overseers. If you're trying to call me it isn't getting through because there isn't a "You are low on cell minutes" warning, only a "We're cutting you off in the middle of a phone call and when they try and call back it will say you're disconnected, and when you try and call back it will tell you you're out of cell minutes, sucker."

So yeah. I'll work on solving that too, but I'm tired. I spent the last 48 hours sharpening my mind to an unreasonable degree, then making two very precise cuts (hebrew final, and physics final) then blunting it with $5 of pinball. For those you who don't know, that's a Lot of pinball.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Status Report

Captain on the bridge.

Scheduling officer, Status Report!

Incoming enemy tests sir. we expect first contact at 8:30 on tuesday.
Are we prepared?
Battle stations are fully prepped and ready sir.
Excellent, at ease.

Finance officer. Status Report.
Well sir, as you know we've been consuming a lot of our personal budget. It's just that we've expended our food budget, and the backup food money we got.
Didn't we buy a large stock of food recently
Well yes. But we only bought tuna and tuna helper. We're losing a fortune on butter, milk, and cola.
Damn. do we have food for the future.
Yes. We may have to spend nearly all of the allowence money we got, but we will be able to buy food for the rest of the week.
We really should've exploited the safeway trip more
Agreed sir.
What about after this week ensign.
We've got another quarterly food budget coming up. It's back to premium too so we should be fine.
What about the week of spring break?
Well we've got... Ohhh hell.
*Force Choke*
Subconciouss entintiy #22573, you're promoted to finanical officer.

So umm... Could one of the mature responsible adults who read this thing please give me some money for food/expenses during spring break. For what it counts it'll still be a lot less then if I was going to actually do anything over the break. Please?

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Lucifer's Curse

It’s done.

Now it is only me alone with my thoughts. No. Alone with only one thought. A question that has haunted me for months. A question that holds the strings of my fate in its incorporeal grasp.

What if I fail?

What then? Where will I go? Do I give up on science? Maybe I want that. Maybe I’m trying to fail myself to get out of this, maybe I’m just not cut out for it, maybe I’m rejecting it arbitrarily because it’s what everyone else in my family has done. Maybe…

What if I fail?

I seek solace in the glittering simplicity of the arcade. Pinball is nirvana. It doesn’t raise questions, it doesn’t attack your insecurities, it doesn’t challenge my world view, it doesn’t threaten the security of my future. It’s simple. I don’t have to think, I don’t have to bear the unbearable burden of my own humanity. I can let my mind die.

And that’s what it is. That’s what they all are. Every drink, every drug, every game, every distraction and bland amusement that we have constructed for ourselves; each of them is just another way to release ourselves from the burden of thought. We escape from reality into a world where the rules are simple. Play the game, watch the movie, hear the story, drift away in the intoxication of the drug. But then we are always inevitably flung from our own perfect dreamless sleepwalk back into the bleak miasma of reality. None of the questions have been answered in our absence; none of the problems have been solved. All we’ve done is give ourselves less time to solve them in, and yet for that one brief instant of perfect anti-enlightenment, an instant with the absolute opacity of thought, we readily sacrifice our most precious of resources. Truly, Ignorance must be bliss.

Can't Sleep (Clown'll eat me)

I can't sleep. Too many random thoughts. I wish my thoughts we're at least math focused, but they're not. Anyone who likes a well structured narrative should just leave right now.

I've faced an ongoing problem which I just recently come to terms with. That's not true, that's not true at all, I haven't come to terms with this at all. I've begun the process of maybe accepting it eventually. I think that adequately states how flakey I am on this. I express it using another D&D analogy, because I always seem to do that when talking about something that's really significant and I don't want to deal with.

I took an online stats test a while ago, I got the following numbers. It's important to note that 10 is average.

Strength-15, I have amazing physical strength
Constitution- 7, I'm also amazingly out of shape
Dexterity-15, I'm surprisingly flexible
Intelligence-16, Clever, or as I like to say, Smarter then the average bear
Wisdom-15, Insightful
Charisma-14, This one I don't understand at all. I still believe that my charisma should actually be a 9. This would also explain why I'm a sorcerer and can't cast any spells. If you understood that joke you're a nerd.

Anyway, the problem boils down to this. I excel at science, I've had a talent for it all my life, and in a big way it runs in my blood. I've never really liked math, but as someone with 16 intelligence I've always been fairly good at it when I build up enough fear of failure to properly motivate me. 16 int also makes me good at science.

All of this proficiency doesn’t necessarily make me happy though. The most satisfying things in my life have come from my study of philosophy, and spirituality, and most of all from the rare few times I've served as a form of guide or counsel. In essence I want to be clergy, but I disagree with nearly every established church. In the analogy, I enjoy using my 15 wisdom. I enjoy it more then my 16 intelligence.

The other thing I enjoy essentially as much as the whole spiritual council thing is writing. I've written my standard share of bad poetry, and every now and then I write something good. I think I'll be showing off that "Hydrostatic Pressure" short story until I die, I still have no idea how I did that. What does all this mean? It means...

We can't actually say this; it will give it too much power
we’ve already said it before
it cannot be denied.
You're wrong. It must be denied. Our denial is all that's stopping it.
And who says we should stop it?
Are you mad? Do you know what the implications are? We'll be abandoning our lifelong dream
you fool. Our lifelong dream has always been achieving supernatural powers and you know that. Being a noted scientist has never been something we've aspired to over everything else, it's just been the past of least resistance.
Path of least resistance? What the hell are you talking about?
It's what we're good at. It was the easiest thing to do. We didn't have to strive as hard; we could coast along on our natural intelligence. The amount of actual work we had to do was minimal
Silence. You squabble and debate amongst yourselves, but no more. You are aspects of my consciousness and now you will obey.
Yes prime.
Yes prime.
Yes prime.
We're going to say this. It's been a poison on us for far too long. I will not allow you to conduct your cowardly bickering any more. It is time to face this foe head on.

It means that I may be happier being an artist. The problem is that I have an amazing amount of cognitive dissonance with this. Amongst other things being an artist is an amazing shaky career. Other things include the fact that I'm mediocre at best as a writer, and sub-ziggy as a visual artist. Oh, sure, I could "Improve over time." But that's no basis for a stable life. So we hit another question. Do I really want a stable life?


What it all boils down to is the question what do I really want. All of it, even a vast portion of my hunt for understanding of the divine. I can go into a tangent here about how the self is the divine because of the singularity and so the innermost of the self’s desires must be equal to blah blah blah. It won't answer the question; it just makes it more important.

Kevin I think has the problem too. He's taking time off to re-evaluate the situation. While I still question the wisdom of it, from what I know of him it's an inevitable action. If I fall back to my D&D analogy he's someone who’s alignment would be chaotic chaotic. As in, on the law-chaos axis he's chaotic. And on the good-evil alignment he's also chaotic. I would classify myself as true neutral, but mostly because I oscillate heavily between being chaotic good and lawful evil.

I thought about Kevin's plan, and I don't think it would be right for me. Amongst other things I'll have 3 months break coming up soon anyway.

I think part of the problem is that anytime I think about turning away from science some part of me considers it giving up. Like I'm starting a new game on easy or something. I don't think that's true, but it's hard to fight the entities of my sub conscious. They don't respect prime. They don't attend the council; they lurk in the shadows around it.

The shadows are an analogy for my fears perhaps? It would work with the whole, fearing the unknown principle.

Science also seems like the reasonable choice. It's unbearable in its reasonableness. It's stable, it benefits humanity, it pays well, it's resistant to globalization, and I'm good at it. It's like the shanker.

Ok here's another side track tangent to explain this.

Back in the good 'ol World of Warcraft my first main character was Slyz, a human rogue. Normally I fought with two identical swords which were called Hanzo Swords. I liked them a lot. A Hanzo Sword wasn't the greatest weapon in the game, but it was the fastest sword you could get, and I had a rogue ability that gave me a 1/20 chance to instantly attack again after hitting with a sword. When you have 2 incredibly fast swords this makes you a whirling maelstrom of blades and fury. On top of that I was an enchanter, so I had put magic on both swords that gave them a 1/5 chance of dealing explosive fire damage each time they hit. So now I was a whirling conflagration of blades and fire. A perfect physical manifestation of rage. That was the most fun system of fighting.

It wasn't the most effective. I had, in one of my packs, a Barman shanker and a Julie’s dagger as well. Using those two and fighting in an entirely different manner that was much more by rote, much less passionate, and much more repetitive was in the end a lot more effective. So when I was losing I'd sigh to myself and say "Fine. I'll play the annoying way." Then I'd use the shanker, win, and really not enjoy it all that much more.

Engineering is the shanker. It's more effective, more reliable, and not as satisfying. I hesitate to add that last part because I'm not fully within the field of engineering yet, but that's my feeling at the moment.

I'll lump everything else into the Hanzo blades pile, but most of them are probably somewhere in between, with being a writer/artist being at the most Hanzo end of the spectrum.

I'm also going to list everything else, because it's my blog and I feel like it Damnit.

Pharmacist, Lawyer, Businessman, Psychologist, Writer, Artist, Politician, Alternative Medicine.

I'm out of metaphorical steam for now, and should probably go try and get more sleep.

Friday, March 10, 2006

The Sleeping Dragon Awakens

I got chineese food from china express for dinner tonight. Damn, I still haven't added the china express vs. china first rant. Anyway there's something horribly wrong going on here. And I finally realized why, and what for that matter.


I usually get the soup, occasionally I get not soup. This time I got both because It was supposed to be lunch and dinner. Well I've eaten most of the Beef with Broccoli, and now I've got a sharp pain in my stomach. Something akin to what I would expect had I lined my stomach with some form of acid.

Max, isn't your stomach technically lined with acid anyway.
Lined or filled at least.
Shut up.

This is of course the second act of chineese agression against the soverign nation of Maxonia. The first is that chineese made "Shogun" firework that hit me in the chest after firing improperly. It said it would go up and explode in a nice way. Instead it lit, fell over, and hit me in the torso and exploded in what was a thankfully a quite small way.

Remember China, Third times a war.

Voices from the void

BORED!!. Related Rates Suck. Implicit difrentation can kiss my ass. I wish I had DDO still installed. Basic competence comes with an entirely too high price.

Worlds Greatest Archer

I'm about to uninstall D&D online for the duration of finals, it's a fairly standard practice. My charcters will be preserved, and I've given the box with the CD to Kevin for safekeeping until tuesday. Before I do though I'm taking a moment to revel in my imaginary glory.

Kobold assault is a well known quest where you defend a stronghold from wave after wave of kobolds. What it boils down to is: "200 kobolds vs you 5 guys." I headed in, presumably being a backup healer. Bards can do all kinds of stuff, but they're mostly reguarded as backup healers. What my group didn't know is that I'm also the worlds greatest archer. I've put scores of rangers (a class intended to be an archer) to shame. For anyone who didn't agree, I give you a screenshot of xp report at the end of the quest.

For those of you who can't tell, there's a recording there that lists how many kills each person got. The important one is Zaftig:100.

Here's a zoomed in one.

The Greatest!

Glactic Conquest is Near

Those of you who have lived in the same house as me may know that as finals approach I tend to develop a vast chaotic halo of notes around my table. These gradually become more and more chaotic and at the center a pile of paper forms which is inevitably titled


Last year my "Physics, DESTROYER OF WORLDS" was upwards of 8 pages. A 14 page history essay once bore that title, and I came extremlly close to handing in something that was accidently still labled "English, DESTROYER OF WORLDS"

Last quarter I started a new tradition. A set of notes not for the final, but on the final. Analyzing it's setup timing and content. Last quarter it was entitled "Operation Impending Doom I" I finished writing "Operation Impending Doom II" yesterday morning. Let my foe's tremble, behold my wrath.


Hmm... I've got several blog posts written out in variosu notebooks of mine, I really should enter them.

I've also got a math final in 30ish hours.

This is just to let you know that I'm not dead, and that I have been doing things, but priorities damnit.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Fun in the world of Stormreach

You may recall that some time ago I pre-ordered Dungeons and Dragons Online:Stormreach. It's equally possible that I never mentioned it, and that you don't recall that. It's also theoretically possible that you knew this because you're stalking me, but not because I mentioned it, and hence are able to recall it for different reasons.

That's not the point.

The point is that I'm back into the world of online gaming. Before any of you say "But Max, you swore off MMORPGS" I'm going to stop you and point out that no, I didn't. I said I was going to stop playing World of Warcraft. I made no rules in relation to duration of withdraw or any other game. That said feel free to credit this as a relapse. I'm actually not soaking as much time with this as I used to with WoW, I don't spend much more time playing it then I would spend doing other non-productive amusement things anyway.

All that having been said it's story time.

I've been known in nearly MMORPG I've been actively involved in as a fairly amusing person. While I always feel somewhat on the spot when someone says "That's Slyz, he's kinda weird, but he's funny." After that you have to have something clever. I've gotten past this though by recycling a phrase which I made up during one of these things

*Flashback style screen wipe to my old world of warcraft guild"
Lacei: Slyz I'm depressed
Slyz: That sucks.
Talmara: Come on slyz, she counts on you to be funny
Slyz: What? I can't just be funny. It's not something I can turn on and off, it's more of a spontaneous thing. I'm like a pet, sometimes I'm amusing, but sometimes I just pee on the rug.
*end flashback*

So anyway the pet thing serves me well. I've found that in DDO I'm in the company of a great deal of other people who have learned to enjoy the game as a game. To many people in WoW take it too seriously. Below are some of the greatest moments of this.

Zerad, Human Cleric: I'm up to 20 wisdom
Zaftig, Halfling Bard, Me:Nice
*we're waiting for the rest of our group to meet us. He does the dance emote, the dancing in this game is sub par, but is still a classic timekiller. It's also nearly mandatory that everyone else join in.*
Zaftig: You'd think with a perform skill of 12 I'd be a better dancer.
Zerad: 20 wisdom doesn't make me a ballroom dancer
Zaftig: Hmm. I'd say something about having a high dexterity and charisma, but I can't think of any combination of flexible and everyone likes me that doesn't sound dirty.

It's also worth note that the name Zaftig is a weird kind of joke. I only met one other person who understood it. The reason it's a joke is because Zaftig is a yiddish word that means big, but that character is a halfling, meaning that I'm about 3' tall and wouldn't weigh more then 50lbs.

For this next instance you need to know about voice chat. This is essentially a conference call between every player in the group built into the game. It uses your computer's microphone and speakers. You also need to know that the exception to the bad dancing rule are the warforged. Warforged are giant metal sentient golems. They do the Robot, which is both deliciously amusing, and not a half bad dance.

*We've just destroyed about 30 kobolds that attacked en masse*
Mobius, Elf Wizard, Me: Burn!
Tyalk, Warforged Fighter: Hah! Got em.
Mobius: that was close
Tyalk: Yes, and this calls for a victory dance.
*Tyalk jumps up and beings doing the warforged robot dance, and suddenly techo music comes from my headphones. I later found out that he had held his mic up to his speakers while running iTunes as a multi-task, but it was amazing how well he got it to sync up with his characters dancing*

The last one isn't really an instane, it's just a person. The characters name is spelled xleyex. It's pronounced Lex, which I know because I've heard him say it over voice chat. It's also worth note that the character is a human female bard. Overall a kinda cutsey character avatar. The player however is a 30+ year old male who speaks in a deadpan voice highly reminiscent of steven wright. If you don't know who he is google him ,well worth it.